


Arms Tonight

by eldercunningbro



Series: R+E Mixtape [1]
Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King
Genre: M/M, eddie is the big gay, i will write something that doesnt follow canon one day i swear, only eds and rich show up oops others r mentioned, this took me so long to write im tired and dead and dying inside cool cool coll
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-28
Updated: 2019-09-28
Packaged: 2020-10-30 02:37:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,326
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20807132
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eldercunningbro/pseuds/eldercunningbro
Summary: Richie gave him a big grin, showing off the gap in between his front teeth. Eddie stopped and stared at him, his breath hitching. Richie wasn’t exactly pretty, he had buck teeth and huge glasses that gave him bug eyes, but Eddie wasn’t going to say that he was ugly either. When Richie smiled, his brown eyes grew brighter and his cheeks would have tiny dimples. Eddie loved it when Richie smiled.Richie ruined it however by talking.He did that a lot.[A collection of times Eddie felt safe in Richie's arms]





	Arms Tonight

Eddie was eight years old when Richie first hugged him.

Richie was on the rusty park swings, pushing himself as high as he could possibly go, his long legs spread out, as he grinned. Eddie on the other hand was sitting on the other swing, his legs still planted firmly to the ground. He wanted to have fun like Richie and actually use the swing for its intended purpose, but his mother’s voice was screaming in his head.

_“Swings are death traps Eddie-bear! One wrong move and you’ll be tumbling down to the ground, breaking every bone in your body! One boy once fell off a swing and broke his arm and some of the broken bone shot up his body into his heart and it killed him! You don’t want to die, do you Eddie-Bear?!”_

Eddie definitely did not want to die, so he simply sat on the swing, watching Richie as he swung higher and higher. He kicked a clump of grass on the ground and sighed. This was awkward. Eddie never hung out with Richie on his own, _hell_, he only became friends with Richie a few months ago and that was through Bill. Richie lived next door to Bill, and they enjoyed the same comic books, so they had become firm friends. Bill introduced Eddie to Richie, and Richie introduced them both to Stan, making his total number of friends from one to three. Despite this, Eddie never hung out with Richie on his own. There was always Bill and Stan there too, or maybe just Bill, but never Richie alone. However, on this one occasion Bill was at speech therapy and Stan was forced to go with his family to see his cousins, so it was only Eddie and Richie.

Eddie wasn’t quite sure what he thought about Richie. He was loud, he was messy, his socks never matched, and he had dirt in between his nails, all things Eddie _hated_, but he didn’t hate Richie. Richie was fun. He was loud but he was funny, not that Eddie would ever admit that to his face. He also had good taste in comic books, even though his fascination with puppets was still weird.

“Hey Eds, do you think I could swing all the way round the swing set?”

Eddie looked up at Richie and saw he was swinging dangerously high. His eyes grew large and he yelled.

“No, you idiot! You would just fall and break every bone in your body! Get down before you seriously hurt yourself! Have you ever heard of a bone fracture?! And don’t call me Eds!”

Richie laughed at Eddie but still slowed down his swinging. He eventually pushed his feet onto the ground, stopping completely. Eddie glared at him,

“Now you’ve scuffed your shoes! How are you so messy?”

Richie gave him a big grin, showing off the gap in between his front teeth. Eddie stopped and stared at him, his breath hitching. Richie wasn’t exactly pretty, he had buck teeth and huge glasses that gave him bug eyes, but Eddie wasn’t going to say that he was ugly either. When Richie smiled, his brown eyes grew brighter and his cheeks would have tiny dimples. Eddie loved it when Richie smiled.

Richie ruined it however by talking.

He did that a lot.

“Aww Eds, are you worried about lil’ ol’ me? You are so cute!”

Eddie’s eyes widened and before he could react, Richie jumped up and pinched his cheeks tightly,

“Cute, cute, cute!”

Eddie huffed and his eyebrows furrowed.

“Get off me Richie! I hate it when you do that! I hate when you call me cute, I hate when you pinch my cheeks and I especially hate when you call me Eds!”

Eddie glared at him and stood up off the swing, about to lecture Richie even more, however his foot twisted and he tripped over his own legs with a gasp. Richie’s eyes widened and without thinking, he reached out and caught Eddie in his arms. Instead of letting go, his arms protectively held onto Eddie.

“Jesus Eds! You almost ate shit!”

Eddie looked up at Richie in shock, his heart beating quickly, almost thundering in his small chest. Richie’s arms were still wrapped around him and Eddie blushed. No one ever hugged him except his mom, but this felt…different. When his mom hugged him it felt like a prison. Like she was trying to suffocate him, entrap him so he could never escape. However, this was nice. Richie’s arms were comforting. His hugs weren’t trying to snare him, they were telling him that he was safe. It was nice.

After a minute of silence in Richie’s arms, Eddie coughed awkwardly.

“You…You can let go of me now.” Richie blinked slowly and then let go of Eddie like he was on fire. He jumped back and laughed, but there was no hiding the rising blush on his cheeks.

“Sorry Eds! Just lost track of time, I was imagining you were Mrs K and you know how much she loves her regular Tozier cuddle time.”

Eddie couldn’t concentrate on Richie’s rambling. All he could think about was the feeling of Richie’s arms wrapped around him. _Why did I tell him to let go?_ How safe he felt. _Why did it feel so nice?_ How Richie’s red cheeks looked almost…cute.

Eddie’s face went pale and he looked up at Richie with panic in his eyes.

“I think I need my inhaler.”

* * *

Eddie was thirteen years old when he experienced the worst summer of his life.

If only he had said no when Bill said he wanted to explore the Barrens, or no to helping Ben after his run in with Bowers, or to the rock war, or the slideshow or to any of this. Then maybe, _just maybe_, he wouldn’t be sitting on the dirty floor of an abandoned house, his arm snapped in half, as a killer clown made its’ way towards him, razor sharp teeth ready to tear him limb from limb.

Eddie doesn’t remember when or how Richie gets to him, all he can do is scream and stare at the horror in front of him. Everything is loud, too loud and he doesn’t know if it’s the others or his own head.

_ I’m going to die, oh my fucking God I’m going to die! Ma was right! I’m too weak, I’m too delicate! I can’t do this! I’m going to die and I’m going to be missing and forgotten just like Georgie, just like Betty, just like Corcoran!_

“Eddie?! Eds!? Look at me? Eds!”

He snaps out of his panic and realises that Richie is clinging to him, desperately shaking him and yelling.

“Eddie! Don’t look at the clown! Look at me! Look at me!”

Eddie turns slowly to Richie and stares at him in panic. Richie has tears running down his cheeks and he’s visibly shaking. Eddie has never seen Richie this scared before, never this serious. Richie puts his hands on Eddie’s face, forcing him to look him in the eyes.

“It’s okay Eds, j-just look at me! Don’t look ahead, it’s going to be okay!”

Eddie nods and takes a deep breath, choosing to stare into Richie’s eyes. Somehow, it makes him calm down slightly and he forgets that he could die any second now. A loud crash is heard, and Ben screams out in pain. Eddie’s face snaps back and he sees that the clown has slashed Ben across the stomach and is now grinning manically at the losers. The panic rises again in Eddie’s stomach and he screams.

“Eds no! Don’t look!”

To Eddie’s surprise, Richie wraps his arms around him and pulls him close. He tightly embraces him, and Eddie realises it’s so he won’t get away, so he won’t _look_. Eddie sniffles and buries his face in Richie’s chest. Richie smells a little like smoke and Eddie isn’t sure if it’s from the countless cigarettes he shares with Bev, or the smoke-hole ritual but he doesn’t care. He normally hated this smell but right now he loved nothing more, it was comforting, it was real, it was _Richie_. Nothing around him mattered anymore, not the clown, not the missing kids, not the aching pain in his arm, nothing. All that mattered to Eddie right now was Richie. He could feel Richie stroking his hair gently as he whispered in his ear,

“It’s going to be okay Eds, you’re safe, I’ve got you.”

Despite everything, Eddie believed him.

When Richie lets go of him, Eddie finds himself missing the feeling of Richie wrapped around him and he doesn’t feel as brave anymore. Richie looks at him with a soft smile that soon drops as he notices Eddie’s injury.

“Eds! Your fucking arm!”

Richie panics and looks around the room, all the losers sharing the exact same expression. Richie takes a deep breath and looks at Eddie.

“Okay…I’m…I’m going to snap your arm back into place!”

Eddie’s face drops and he shakes his head furiously,

“DO NOT FUCKING TOUCH ME!”

* * *

When Eddie is fourteen, he still has nightmares.

_“I’ll blow you for nickel…I’ll blow you for a dime… Hell, I’ll blow you FOR FREE!”_

He shouldn’t still be having nightmares. They killed It. It is all over and everyone is safe and alive. Yet despite this, Eddie is still scared. Eddie wakes up every night, drenched in sweat, his heart hammering in his chest because they are so _real_, and tonight is no different. Eddie doesn’t remember much, he never does. All he can remember is the way he felt. Fear, pure fear. Sometimes he’ll remember small phrases,

_What are you looking for Eddie?_

but they are forgotten as soon as he remembers them.

A loud knock comes from Eddie’s window and he almost jumps out of his skin before he looks over and sees it’s only Richie, sitting uncomfortably on his roof. Eddie sighs and walks over, unlocking the window for him.

“Be more quiet or my mom will wake up!”

“Don’t worry Eddie my love, with the way I was banging your mom earlier, she can barely walk let alone come and check on her sweet son.”

“Beep beep Richie.”

Eddie groans and lays back down in his bed. Richie quickly takes off his shoes (after constant nagging from Eddie) and throws them to the side of the room, jumping next to him in the bed.

“This bed is built for only person you know?”

“Oh, shut up Eds, you’re so short you only count as a half a person, so we are all good!”

This happened every night. Well, almost every night. Eddie had banned Richie from coming on days where it’s raining heavily, in case he slipped off the roof and died. Richie scoffed but after seeing the concerned look on Eddie’s face he reluctantly agreed.

He doesn’t remember when it started, Richie just started showing up to his window late at night and had no explanation. When Eddie asked him, he just replied nonchalantly and shrugged.

“I was bored.”

Eddie knew this was a lie, but he didn’t care. Having Richie with him was nice. Richie made him feel safe in ways no one else did. Richie was the only one who kept the nightmares away just with his presence. Not that he would ever tell Richie any of this, his ego was big enough already.

He sighed and turned towards Richie, wrapping his arms around his waist. Richie looked at him in surprise and blushed. Eddie doesn’t blame him, he never initiated hugs, it was always Richie, whilst Eddie pushed him away in mock disgust.

“What are you doing?”

Eddie huffed and looked up at him,

“I’m hugging you, idiot. It’s cold and if you are going to be here, at least be useful and warm me up.”

Richie smiles at him softly and Eddie’s heart skips a beat. He feels himself being pulled closer and Richie is warm. Eddie nuzzles his chest and takes a deep breath. They both lay on the bed and curl up together. This also happens every night. Neither of them ever acknowledge it the next day. They always pretend it never happened, until the next night when they do it again.

They are both afraid. Eddie knows Richie also has nightmares but neither of them bring it up. Richie has woken up to Eddie sobbing in his sleep, but neither of them talk about it. They just curl up together in Eddie’s small bed, silently comforting each other. They never talk about their problems.

Sometimes it’s easier to say nothing.

* * *

Eddie is forty years old when he knocks on Richie’s bedroom door.

He can’t sleep, no matter how hard he tries. His head is swirling with memories he didn’t even know he had forgotten, Derry, the Losers, the clown, _Richie_. How did Eddie forget Richie? When he saw his stupid face at the Jade Orient everything had fallen into place.

_So, this is what I’ve been missing. _

Eddie’s life was pretty fulfilling, he had a good job, he earned a decent salary and he had a wife. Yes, it was debatable if he even loved his wife, but he had one and that was the main point. He had someone to take care of him and make him feel loved and safe. Yet despite all of this, his life always felt like something was missing.

Who knew that it was Richie ‘fucking’ Tozier?

Eddie huffed and knocked again on the door, louder this time. He couldn’t wait till tomorrow morning, he needed to see Richie now. Without Richie, Eddie knew he would not be able to sleep a wink and as a risk analyst, Eddie knew the dangers of sleep deprivation. He was about to knock again when the door swung open and Richie stood there sleepily, staring At Eddie. He was dressed only in a shirt and boxers and Eddie was about to blush before he noticed.

“Are you so narcissistic that you sleep in your own goddamn merch? Who wears a shirt with their face on it, asshole?”

Eddie rolls his eyes and walks into his motel room. Richie raises his eyebrows and yawns,

“Good evening to you too, spaghetti head. To what do I owe this pleasure?”

Eddie makes himself comfortable on Richie’s bed and wrinkles his nose in disgust at the clothes Richie has strewn across the floor.

“Do you know how unhygienic it is to leave your dirty clothes on the floor?”

“Well if I knew I was going to have company I would have tidied the place up a bit, but you kind of just showed up out of nowhere, my dear Eds.”

Eddie scoffed and watched as Richie came and sat next to him on the bed.

“I…I couldn’t sleep…”

The bed creaks as Richie moves closer to Eddie and sighs.

“That makes two of us Eds. This is all so fucking insane…”

Eddie mumbles in agreement and leans slowly against Richie. Richie’s eyes widen but he puts his arms around Eddie and holds him tight. Eddie notices he still smells like smoke after all these years.

“All I want to do is go home, Rich…but now, I don’t know what home is. I thought home was in New York with Myra, but it isn’t. I’m not happy there, I never was.”

Richie goes stiff and looks at him in surprise.

“Then, where is your home Eds?”

“I think…”

Eddie looks up at Richie and takes a deep breath. He’s known all this time what home was. It wasn’t Derry, it wasn’t his mom, it wasn’t New York and it sure as hell wasn’t Myra.

His home was lanky, messy and told the worst jokes in the world.

“I think you’re my home Rich.”

Richie goes silent and gapes at Eddie. The panic begins to set into Eddie’s stomach. _You’ve done it now Eddie! Now Richie is going to hate you forever and never associate with you ever again. How could you be this much of an idiot. Ma was right, Ma was right! Ma was righ-_

Eddie’s panicked thoughts suddenly ceased as he felt Richie press his lips against his own. After the initial shock, he wrapped his arms around Richie and leaned into the kiss. It was short and chaste, but it was everything Eddie ever wanted. It wasn't like kissing Myra. Myra’s kisses were wet and sloppy, like the kind of kiss you’d get off your aunt at Christmas. Richie was soft and warm. He radiated love and safety.

Richie parted away slowly and looked at Eddie softly,

“You’re my home too Eds.”

Eddie smiled and laughed loudly, jumping onto Richie, embracing him tightly.

“I can’t believe it took us twenty-seven fucking years to confess to each other and it happened while you’re wearing a shirt with your own fucking face on it!”

Richie kissed his cheek and grinned.

“It’s all about the timing Eds, got to make sure it’s perfect.”

Eddie spends the rest of the night curled up with Richie, kissing him softly. They don’t go any further, they are both too tired, too scared to do anything else. But it’s okay, Eddie thinks to himself, once this is all over, they can do whatever they want. They can learn about each other all over again and it’s okay because they have all the time in the world. 

* * *

Eddie is forty years old when he realises that he’s dying.

Richie is holding onto him tightly, sobbing and Eddie weakly wraps his own arms around him. There is a sharp stinging pain in his chest, but he doesn’t care anymore. Eddie knows he is going to die. He knows he doesn’t have much time left, so he might as well make the most of what he has by spending it with Richie.

“R-Rich…There’s something I have to tell you.”

Tears are still falling down Richie’s cheeks, but he sniffs and looks Eddie in the eyes, caressing his cheek softly. Eddie curses the sewer for being so dark, if this is the last time he’s going to see Richie it could at least be in better lighting. He wants to memorise Richie’s face and all of his features. He wants Richie to be the last thing he remembers. Richie’s stupid big bug eyes, his stupidly cute dimples, his messy hair. Everything.

“Yes Eds? What is it?”

Richie’s voice is desperate and Eddie’s heart aches.

“P-please hold me again…You know I-I always…”

Richie responds immediately by wrapping his arms around Eddie, holding him in a tight embrace. Eddie feels like he’s eight again, when Richie hugged him for the first time. Eddie smiles weakly and Richie whispers in his ear.

“Y-you’re going to be okay Eds, alright? We are going to get you out of here! You’re going to be okay!”

He wants Richie to be right so bad, but Eddie knows better. He is dying. Eddie can feel his body getting weaker and keeping his eyes open is getting harder and harder every second. He weakly lifts his arm to stroke Richie’s cheek and smiles. Eddie had spent his whole life terrified of death. His mother had ingrained it into him.

_ Don’t do that Eddie-Bear or you’ll die! Don’t eat that Eddie or you’ll get cancer and die! Don’t play sports, your asthma will get worse and then you’ll die! Do you want to die Eddie-bear? Do you?!_

Yet, this wasn’t so bad. If he didn’t feel so weak, he would laugh. Eddie snuggled into Richie’s arms and looked up at him.

“You know Richie…I a-always…”

Eddie coughed before he could finish and smiled. Maybe dying wasn’t so bad, it couldn’t be, not when he was in Richie’s arms. In fact, he felt safe, he felt warm, he felt like he was at home.

_This is nice_, he thought as he died.

**Author's Note:**

> So...I'm not super proud of this tbh but I'm proud I finished it!!! 
> 
> This fic is based off the song Arms Tonite by Mother Mother in my reddie playlist! Hopefully I'll make more fics based on songs in the playlist when I have time!
> 
> Thank you for reading! It means so much to me! Comments are greatly appreciated!!!


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